Tag Archives: kids

Kids from yesteryears

I got so slack with blogging even though I had all the time in the world…. almost, so to speak…. and now that it’s stolen five minutes here and there, again, I feel a bit more motivated. God knows why…

My first batch of Thai kindergarteners are in grade 7 now. Time flies. They were special to me. The one with the curly hair, people often thought she was my daughter. Smart and insecure and emotional, so much like me. Then, the chatty little boy, naughty and pesky, but sharp and creative and considerate. I always said to people, if I ever have a son, I would like a son just like him. Always have been attracted to similar characters over the years, ever since. And then, the boy with the huge eyes, quiet, absorbing everything with some kind of ageless wisdom, making me want to be better than I was, try to come up to his image of me…. rather unsuccessfully, I would say. And the little princesses – I’m not supposed to have favourites, but I always do. I did have sleepless nights about them, and worries, and sometimes cried my eyes out. I hope they prepared me to be a better mother. I’m still feeling woefully inadequate at the moment.

I promise I will try to come back to blogging…. I need to keep my sanity, keep some kind of footing, grounding…. and I lost so much time, so many thoughts, again, just all that suppressed fear I had all along my pregnancy…..

Anyway…. my kids…. now I have my own, after all these years….

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Lisa, clove and cinnamon

Yes, Flores is still beautiful. Yes, I still enjoy the warm days and getting wrapped up in a blanket in the evenings. Yes, I’m still sort of happy. But we will be paying the price very soon, I’m sure.

I wish I could stay here and continue running the business.

I wish… I wish so many things. But what I wish for is completely irrelevant. I’m not in the position to ask for anything from anyone, life, fate, or god.

Lots of pics from beautiful Ngada country. Enjoy.

Ceremony halfway up the volcano – I didn’t make it, only my camera did.

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And the rest here are actually easily accessible on a motorbike, ideal for lazy people like me.

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(Gabriela, clove and cinnamon is one of my favourite books ever.  I hadn’t thought about it for years, but remembered it just now, driving by those mats of fragrant spices drying in the sun.)

 

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It’s just too much sometimes.

If someone dropped a small kid in my lap now, I would take it.

I know there are so many things wrong with me, and and and….

and I cannot talk about this.

I took many of these pictures and ran away to hide my tears.

Can you find the world’s biggest bell in one of the photos?

By the way, the first one is my colleague and friend with her son. Mine would be the same age now.

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Oh. And here is the same mother and daughter from April four and a half years ago, and just the other day.

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Echoes

I went back to school for the first time since early March, and meeting people from my old life stirred up an awful lot of memories. Whatever happened here, I still belong to this place, and I have a family here – as long as there are still people around who remember me. Not sure how long that will last, though.

This is just a completely random collection of photos from 2006 to 2012. Many of these kids are already in grade 7 now.

Maybe I miss school just a little bit now. What I definitely don’t miss is the workload, the classes of 32 kids, the last-minute announcements and other bullcrap from management… just the “everyday life” bit. Not many illusions left. But I love looking at photos just now, and remembering these kids 🙂

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Kids of Asia

I haven’t found a single image with a child from Cambodia and Singapore…. and I didn’t have a camera when I went to Hong Kong…. but here is a rather random collection from all the other countries I’ve been to.

Agra, India

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Kathmandu, Nepal

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Tibetan refugees in Pokhara, Nepal

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Bali, Indonesia

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Papua, Indonesia

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Banda, Indonesia

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Sulawesi, Indonesia

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Flores, Indonesia

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Jawa, Indonesia

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Yangon, Myanmar

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Bagan, Myanmar

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Perhentian islands, Malaysia

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Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia

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Chiang Mai, Thailand

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Luang Prabang, Laos

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Peitou, Taiwan

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Can you guess which Asian country she is from?

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Village view

Today I got this chance to look around the old village. As in many places, turns out it’s outsiders who operate the guesthouses and businesses in the new village, near the monuments. The locals don’t get much out of the deal. A young guy took me in his tuktuk and I let him charge me more than the normal price would be. (I also went to see more temples around, and I will write about Jain temples sometime later, I still need to learn more.)

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Walls get these decorative motifs for weddings.

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It’s a pretty place, actually. Lots of bright colours, and quite clean. Unfortunately, there wasn’t a single kid who didn’t want money. I gave them biscuits. Then a woman ripped the packet out of my hand. All this with the driver staying with me…. So, not an experience I would like to repeat, it’s just too unpleasant. And I’m not going to hand out money, it’s not right. I don’t like this situation, there will be no winners, no matter what I do or they do.

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My driver

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Goats and cows don’t give a shit (oops…. they do that one), but anyway, now you know why I have so many street views with goats and cows!

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I wish I could write something more meaningful about all this, but I simply cannot…. So let me just add my initial snippets, like, my philosophical insights into India….

When I step into dung…. I actually hope it used to belong to a cow.

Masala looks the same when it comes out as it did when it went in. (I love it. But my stomach just doesn’t…..)

Sorry, too much shit. But somehow this aspect of the normal bodily functioning sort of comes to the forefront sometimes….

Now I know where the 12-based counting system came from (as opposed to decimal). People use it here for counting. It’s the three digits on your four fingers (the thumb is out), 3×4=12. I thought it must come from 10 fingers + 2 feet.

Nana mint is almost as good as fresh lassi.

And you don’t want to be in a cycle rickshaw that is having a friendly race with another cycle rickshaw!

 

Faces of Yangon

No, I’m not back to Yangon for a while, and not homesick either, just happened to be looking for some photos of my kids posing with a python, and remembered the city that was meant to be my home for two years. I see its charms, it is an eternally cheerful and resilient city, but we never clicked. But there are still many memories to hold onto, and many friends that were really difficult to leave behind. Story of my life. Never-ending goodbyes.

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And the streets where I hardly ever took photos, though I always knew I should be. I still need to go back and get to be a casual traveller.

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